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xxlonelyangelxx
01 March 2007 @ 07:37 am
I feel the need for a new LJ header/layout thingymejiggy, and I found this totally awesome site for stuff like that <3. It's where I got my myspace layout too, and it does facebook [which I dun have] Xanga, blogger ect. ect. I'm not actually that into anime, but the Hiro one I found was just *so* cute that I had to have it. Unless I find something more fitting... but I doubt it.

Oh and I found out about two effing awesome new bands, Kids In Glass Houses, who so far have only created their single, Me, Me, Me, but I swear it's one of the best things I've ever heard! And there's the incredibly wonderful fantastically amazing The Fray, but I've known about them for ages, so they don't really count. The IV Thieves are the other band I'm now really into, 'cause their album is a masterpiece I can tell you!

Mkay so that was a fairly random post, and I'm sorry if it sounds stupid but give my SOME credit, it is twenty to eight on thursday morning. I'll update later, and change the layout, probably tonight but perhaps tomorrow if I dun get the chance. Till then; over and out people;;xx.
 
 
Current Location: My Room, duh!
Current Mood: cheerfulcheerful
Current Music: Me, Me, Me - Kids In Glass Houses.
 
 
xxlonelyangelxx
09 February 2007 @ 12:32 pm
Blake Isaacs? Pah, forget that, t'was a crap idea anyway. Now I've got Alexandre Meadows and Foster Hawkwood, both of whom I quite like. Alex doesn't actually have a profile, 'cause I wanted to start RPing with him straight away, but Foster does. That very annoying person -cough-MARQY-cough- won't actually accept it, and keeps skimming in and out but not doing anything about it, but eventually she'll get round to it. I hope.

So yeah, anyway, here's Foster's profile [minus the history, which I kinda screwed up].

Name: Foster Hawkwood.
Age: Seventeen.
Gender: Male
Job: Trainee Blacksmith.
Appearance: If you were to place Foster in a crowd of many, twenty, thirty people perhaps, it’s unlikely that you would ever find him again. His almost too ordinary features blend in perfectly with other towns folk, and the light showering of pale brown freckles sprinkled across the bridge of his nose mean that his naturally childlike face is made even more so. In a world where appearance is everything, perhaps he would be ridiculed, mocked for his face of such simplistic beauty, but not in his time. No, in his time, Foster is neither praised nor slandered for the way he looks, resulting in the possibly sad fact that he is never noticed for such matters.

Eyes of the purest blue are framed with long, charcoal black lashes, bringing out the strong gold flecks in his irises. From a distance, these are just the ordinary eyes of a peasant boy, but when up close, they are much more gateways into his soul. Rather than raising his thin, pink lips to smile, or scowling with his long, white brow, his eyes will either laugh with the most innocent of happiness, or burn with much overdue bitterness. There’s simply no in between where Foster is concerned.

Long, golden locks curl once they reach the crown of his head, flicking outwards and tumbling onto his lithe shoulders. The flaxen colour of his hair greatly extenuates the small beams of gold in his eyes, setting them ablaze, and accompanying his curls beautifully. Although mostly tied back and kept away from his face, there are odd occasions where Foster will allow his hair its freedom, leaving it to hang loosely around his forehead, creating a somewhat dazzling fringe.

Now if the above information is going to lead you to believe that Foster Hawkwood is the most handsome man alive, or that he burns with searing beauty, then please, do not hesitate to erase it from your mind. What you have been told about his features is all true, there is no denying, and on their own, perhaps they are somewhat beautiful, but when combined to make a face, they become nothing but ordinary.

Ordinary.
Personality: Every aspect of Fosters personality, if you want to call it that, screams arrogance. This may be partly true, and has been said by many a person, but if you search just a little bit deeper, you’ll see something that you probably won’t be expecting. Fear.

If you were to ask him whether he thought he was good at his job, you would get a very straight ‘yes’. The same goes for whether he thought he was a good person, a good friend, a good son and a good brother, and there is just about nothing in the world that can change that. Foster probably isn’t the easiest of people to talk to, giving straight answers to questions yet not asking any of his own, and he is a total stranger to the possibly absurd idea of chatting. This isn’t to say he’s a quiet person, in fact when alone or with those he trusts, a boy of rather the opposite nature comes out to play, but the problem is there’s hardly anyone who has ever been allowed to see this, because of what has been mentioned before; fear.

Have you ever stepped back and looked at your life, and felt nothing but fear for all you have to loose? Or felt physically sick at the thought of being alone, for always and forever? Well, if you have, then you’ll know what ticks through Fosters mind everyday of every year. The fear of being told; I don’t love you like I loved you yesterday, is all that he loathes and hates about the world, the only thing that has the power to crumple his body and defeat his defences. You are, most probably, sitting at home and wondering why on earth he covers this up with the arrogant exterior that he possesses. Well you can ask the question as many times as you like, and you’ll never get an answer, because not even Foster knows this. It’s simply something that he adopted once, and then couldn’t seem to shake, however hard he tried.
Likes:
* Hard Work
* Being Around His Family
* Sleeping
* Playing The Flute
* Caring For His Sisters
* Nature
Dislikes:
* Chatting
* Letting People Down
* Royalty [He’s fiercely proud and independent]
* Slackers
Fears:
* Being Alone
* Being Shunned By Those He Loves [^^ sort of like that one]
Strengths:
* His [overlooked] Intelligence.
* His Loyalty.
* His Apparent Calmness.

The only bit I'm perticually proud of is the appearance, which I thought went okay actually. Feel free to tell me I'm wrong though ^__^
 
 
Current Location: My Room [As Always]
Current Mood: hungryhungry
Current Music: Dirty Little Secret - The All American Rejects
 
 
xxlonelyangelxx
04 February 2007 @ 04:55 pm
...  
From Aaron's LJ.

Comment and I will:

1) Tell you why I friended you.

2) Associate you with a song/film/tv...I added TV cos I was having trouble with the other 2.

3) Tell a random fact about you.

4) Tell a first memory about you.

5) Associate you with a character/pairing.

6) Ask something I've always wanted to know about you.

7) Show you my favourite user pic of yours.

8) In reply, you must repost in your LJ.
 
 
Current Location: My Room
Current Mood: creative
Current Music: Home - Rooster
 
 
xxlonelyangelxx
04 February 2007 @ 04:44 pm
The post underneath this one is... slightly melodramatic, to say the least. You should probably just ignore it, as I doubt it makes much sense, I swear too much, and most of it isn't really true. Well it is, but it isn't. If you get me...?

Right, so I'm making this new RPing character, [yes, another one], and he IS gonna be about a hundred times better than Marcus and Callie. He's called Blake Isaacs, he's nineteen, and he's lived with his step brother/best friend, Thomas, since the age of five. I don't really have time to carry on, but once I've written his complete profile I'll post it up here. And remember, it WILL be better than the others -crosses fingers-

Bye for now, people.
 
 
Current Location: My Room
Current Mood: thoughtfulthoughtful
Current Music: How To Save A Life - The Fray
 
 
xxlonelyangelxx
01 February 2007 @ 04:03 pm
So I have my mother, who is suffering from a bloody awful bout of cancer, downstairs screaming the odds because I got mud on her precious fucking carpet, my father who is so wrapped up in the way things 'used to be when he was a lad' that he can't see how much things have moved on, and that women sometimes need a little bit of help, and my friends who put me down and leave me hanging so much that sometimes I wish that I'd never met them. Wow, what a fucking wonderful life I'm living at the moment. I've thought about running away, but I haven't got anywhere or anyone to go to, and I'm not desperate enough to kill myself, so I really don't see a way out of this hell. I spend so long trying to please other people, and putting myself down, yet they all just turn the tables and make me pay for things that aren't really my fault, and then laugh about it like it's some sort of joke. Or cry about it, like my mum, and then blame me for that too. Damned if I do, damned if I don't, and I just don't understand any of it. I'd happily be on my own 24/7 [with the exception of the internet and my friends on there] so that I couldn't muck everything up and make everyone unhappy, but then I'm told to buck up and stop acting like a sulking toddler. Like I said, damned if I do, damned if I don't. So if you're a mass murdering freak out there, who's looking for their next victim, please don't hesitate in coming for me.

=[
 
 
Current Location: My Bedroom
Current Mood: depresseddepressed
Current Music: My Mother Crying, My Father Screaming and My Dogs Barking.
 
 
xxlonelyangelxx
30 January 2007 @ 08:31 pm
Now I know
That I can’t make you stay
But where’s your heart
But where’s your heart
But where’s your...

And I know
There’s nothing I can say
To change that part
To change that part
To change!

So many
Bright lights that cast a shadow
But can I speak?
Well is it hard understanding
I’m incomplete
A life that’s so demanding
I get so weak
A love that's so demanding
I can’t speak

I am not afraid to keep on living
I am not afraid to walk this world alone
Honey if you stay
I’ll be forgiven
Nothing you can say can stop me going home

Can you see
My eyes are shining bright
Cause I’m out here
On the other side
Of a jet black
Hotel mirror
And I’m so weak
is it hard understanding
I’m incomplete
A love that's so demanding
I get weak

I am not afraid to keep on living
I am not afraid to walk this world alone
Honey if you stay
I’ll be forgiven
Nothing you can say can stop me going home

I am not afraid to keep on living
I am not afraid to walk this world alone
Honey if you stay
I’ll be forgiven
Nothing you can say can stop me going home

These bright lights have always blinded me
These bright lights have always blinded me
I say...

I see you lying next to me
With words I thought I’d never speak
Awake and unafraid
Asleep or dead

Cause I see you lying next to me
With words I thought I’d never speak
Awake and unafraid
Asleep or dead

Cause I see you lying next to me
With words I thought I’d never speak
Awake and unafraid
Asleep or dead

Cause I see you lying next to me
With words I thought I’d never speak
Awake and unafraid
Asleep or dead

(Repeated in background x6)
Or, deeeeaaaad....

(foreground)
I am not afraid to keep on living
I am not afraid to walk this world alone
Honey if you stay
I'll be forgiven
Nothing you can say can stop me going home

I am not afraid to keep on living
I am not afraid to walk this world alone
Honey if you stay
I'll be forgiven
Nothing you can say can stop me going home

I am not afraid to keep on living
I am not afraid to walk this world alone
Honey if you stay
I'll be forgiven
Nothing you can say can stop me going home.

-sings over and over again- The song just won't leave my head, and it's driving me crazy. MCR are like my...third favourite band [after P!ATD and FOB <3 of course] and I do love that song, but seriously, I'd do anything to get it to go right now!

Oh and I heard their new song today, I can't remember the name of it now, but it was awesome. Seriously awesome, as most of their stuff is.

February 5th, February 5th, February 5th! Me and Bryony have been running into school everyday for the past like three weeks, screaming at each other how long until that date. 'Cause me can't wait 'til Infinity On High finally comes out!
 
 
Current Location: My Bedroom
Current Mood: Musical
Current Music: Famous Last Words - My Chemical Romance
 
 
xxlonelyangelxx
24 January 2007 @ 08:10 pm
The title says it all really, I'm dying of boredom here. It's a Wednesday night, I've just listened to all 111 songs on my itunes, and MSN won't stop playing up. Apart from TURP, it looks like I'm in for a pretty teadius night, eh? Yes, I do know that I haven't posted the S/Z fic or the Charlie snippets, and that's mainly because I forgot [as usual] but also because I've been kinda busy with school. My teachers don't seem to understand the meaning of 'relaxation' possibly because they're all evil aliens from the fiery core of mars [oh no, that's me =P], but it means that I have to sit at home neglecting my LJ to do it. -hmfft-.

Oh yeah, and a BIG thankies to Aaron, for fixing my LJ [which went very dodgy this afternoon] and making my header. Both are awesome.
 
 
Current Location: Bopping Around The House
Current Mood: boredbored
Current Music: Panic! At The Disco - But It's Better If You Do
 
 
xxlonelyangelxx
20 January 2007 @ 04:01 pm
Okay so I got really bored the other day, and started talking to Bryony, and she told me about this roleplaying site that she knew of. I went to check it out, and now there are two of them and I'm addicted! I've written two [three, but one of them is too bad to post] character profiles that I'll stick up here, although I do warn you that I wrote them quite late last night, so don't you go expecting masterpieces.

Callie-Ami Rose Ange

Name: Callie-Ami Rose Ange.
Age: 13.
Gender: Female.
Position: None really.
Race: Human.
Background: Born in Southern France and intending to stay there through her adult life, Callie lives with her young mother and her grandparents, in a tiny village on the outskirts of the country. They are not poor, but not particularly rich, and are neither frowned upon nor praised for their presence in the village.

She knows so little about him, yet misses him more than she could ever have imagined. The man who brought her into the world, and almost took her out of it, still clings to her heart and refuses to let go, pulling her deeper and deeper into despair. Callie's life without her father is one of great pain, one that is almost not worth living, but nobody seems to understand. Mother tells her to move on, to let go of the memories that she holds so dear and say a final goodbye to her father, but to her, that makes no sense. If letting go of her memories, the only thing that she has left of him anymore, is what moving on is all about, then maybe moving on isn't the right thing to do. And so the confusion builds up, piles on top of the loneliness, the desperation, the grief, and helps to form the broken life of Callie-Ami Rose Ange.
Appearance: The dark, crimson colouring of her lips, the jet black wisps of hair, tumbling over her left eye, and the deep, hazel whirlpools, filled with misty clouds that tell no truth, yet tell no lies, clash terribly against the ghostly white skin of her face. But somehow she still manages to remain a girl of great beauty, standing out because of the clashing combination, and drawing unwanted attention to herself through the huge, sad eyes that she possesses. Looking through the gateways is like staring into her soul, being pulled through into another world, a world where pain is the sky and anger the sea, raging through and burning your heart.
Personality:
On the surface, Callie seems like most thirteen year olds you might meet. Quiet, and slightly lacking in self confidence, she isn't one to describe how she's feeling, and leaves others to decide through her language and body movements. When called upon for help, she's happy to give her time and patience, although generally prefers to stay private and keep herself to herself, much like many children whom you are likely to know. But locked up inside, far from the knowledge of others, she is anything but a normal child. Anger and pain, grief and confusion, sadness and rage, all are racing around her body and burning to get out, to let the rest of the world know the terror she keeps inside. She knows that she scares people often, with a word, or a look, or a single tear, and she knows that it's enough to bring her emotions crashing into the real world, stunning people around her. But gradually, slowly and surely, she's learning to keep things locked away, somewhere inside her that nobody will ever reach…
Weapon: None.
Additional: She has a bird [probably a Raven...] that I'll write a
Charrie form for later on.


Marcus 'Shotgun' Way

Name: Marcus "Shotgun" Way

Age: Twenty Five

Society: Psyche

Powers: Marcus posses the power to shift gravity, meaning that he can pull the gravity force away from somebody, causing them to stop breathing.

Appearance: You look at Marcus, drinking him in, absorbing every possible detail. Those huge, thoughtful brown eyes, his deep hazel pupils drawing you in, tugging at your curiosity. The smooth, black hair falling across his forehead, half covering the eyes that threaten to reach you again, every strand of straight, thick hair lifting up and revealing them each time he inhales. You tear your gaze away from his face, your eyes straining with reluctance, and force yourself to focus on his body. The man before is tall, five foot seven, eight perhaps, and holds himself in a casual, almost sloppy, manner. Almost. You have no doubt that underneath his smart, yet partially informal, jacket lies a body that would take your breath away, although it's hard to tell through his carefull chosen outfit. You look away, both hurt and relieved to be looking in the opposite direction to where Marcus is standing. Despite his obvious charm and somewhat pretty, very pretty, face, there's something about him that scares you. You try and shake it from your thought, but you can't. Didd you really see that hint of evil in his eyes?

History:'For the first few years after I was born, we lived in this small, stone house, somewhere lost in the hundreds acres or so of lush countryside outside the grounds. I can still remember holding on tight to my father's hand, and being led deep into the woods, right to the centre where no sunlight could reach. Even just thinking about it, I can feel the long branches of the trees reaching out and tickling my face, and the small, sharp stones underneath my feet. I'll never forget the joy and pleasure that I felt when we ran around, laughing and joking until long after the sun left the sky. But what I can remember most vividly, is the day that my whole life changed, beyond recognition. That day was March 24th, many years ago, on a cold, frosty spring morning. I'd had an argument with my mother, about something futile and pointless, something so stupid that I can't even remember it now, and I left the house in a rush of fury. Now the next set of events are anything but clear, things jumping around in my head and pausing at certain times, then skipping to others without warning. See, now I'm in the house, standing over the bleeding bodies of my parents, too fearful to move, but too hurt to stay still. The hole inside my fathers chest leaks blood, startlingly bright and painful thick, spilling over and onto his shirt. I want to peer down, to see if the bullet is still lodged in his body, but I'm too rigid to bend down. I glance over at my mother, who is lying face down, with a hole straight through the back of her skull. Her long, golden locks are stuck together, glued by slowly congealing blood, and her body is thrown across the floor. Either she was grabbed from behind, and then pushed to the ground before being shot, or she put up a great struggle. Both were plausible.'

You watch as he closes his eyes and lays his head on the table in front of you, obviously in awful distress. You urge him to stop, to leave the room and not look back, but you're secretly glad when he chooses to continue.

'I spent ten birthdays inside that house, with those two men, the same two men who had killed my parents and left them to rot, right in front of my eyes. At first I hated them, hated them more than you could ever imagine, but slowly that died. After years of having that hatred for them locked inside, I became tired of having nobody left in the world. I grew weaker and weaker, day by day, and eventually I gave up all together. Then things grew easier, not a lot easier, but a bit, and they gradually came to accept that fact that I was loyal to them, and them only. So when I turned ten, I was allowed to go to school. And That's where I met Gee, the one man to whom I owe my life to. When I first met him, he was a drunken drug addict, a guy who thought about himself and nobody else. Just the kind of person I needed, I craved, somebody who could be as selfish as hell and yet still show me a good time. Yeah, we got stoned, yeah, we bunked school, and yeah, we spent hours of the day getting drunk , but he was the only true friend I had ever had. We had good days [when we did nothing but talk], and bad days [when we did nothing but drink and smoke], but there were never days when we didn't have absolute in each other. That's why his disappearance, at the age of eighteen, came as such a surprise. He hadn't said anything to me, not even a mention of leaving, and it pretty much cut me up. I was now totally alone again, rapidly loosing faith in my 'family' and without Gerard to help me out, life was at an all time low.'

He closes his mouth, his face torn with pain, his body crippled over the chair. You wish he hadn't continued now, you wish that he hadn't opened up his heart and poured it out to you, because now you know. You know how lonely, how desperate and how hurt he was, and you also know that he was willing to do anything to make things better. Anything...

Personality: As a child, Marcus was understandably quiet and a child lacking in any self confidence. Up until the age of nineteen he kept himself to himself as much as possible, trying his best to keep out of anybodies way. But then everything changed. He found the humans, or rather, the humans found him, and then he was forced to take on a new character, somebody far from the real Marcus. So he was 'reborn', taking on a new personality and a new life. He must be charming, witty, kind and gentle, whilst trying to portray that he isn't perfect, just happy. Although this combination is difficult, especially for a young man with the kind of past that Marcus is trying to put behind him, the new him seems to come much more easily than expected. Now all he has to do is keep it up infront of his new friends...

Special Attributes: Marcus has been given the nickname 'Shotgun', due to his incredible talents with a gun in his hand.
 
 
Current Location: Dad's Study
Current Mood: tiredtired
Current Music: Accidently In Love - Counting Crows
 
 
xxlonelyangelxx
15 January 2007 @ 07:45 pm
Right, so I finally took the plunge, and got one of these LJ thingys. And now I have to admit, they're pretty addictive, aren't they?

Now as most people who know me know, my writing is appalling, yet writing is something that I love to do. Don't ask me why - just don't. So this is a place where I can post stuff that I've written, without having to be totally embaressed about what my friends will think. Later on I'll post one of my 'oneshots', something that I wrote for school, about Stanley and Zero [Holes - Louis Sacher, we had to read it for class *yawn*] pairing, and what happened to them after the book ended. It was a blast to write, even if it isn't a masterpiece, so there we go! Oh and then I'll post some snippets from a Charlie [Home and Away] fic I plan to write, although I'm not sure whether it'll go ahead or not. I'm just testing out my ideas I guess.

Sorry if I rambled, you'll have to get used to that, it's the thing I do best =]].
 
 
Current Location: In My Room
Current Mood: happyhappy
Current Music: You Could Be Happy - Snow Patrol
 
 
 
 

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